Humans have a very deeply rooted habit of judging others with or without adequate knowledge about anyone's life, personality, problems, and circumstances. We jump to conclusions based on how our mind processes information, and based on our up-bringing and culture.
Our sense of envy and jealousy also plays a very vital role in judging others. Many times we want to drag a person down from his/her level, to the lowest level we think is fit for that person, just so that we can satisfy our pride. We try to slander a person's reputation, so that we can uplift our malicious spirit to a level higher than the one we slandered.
This signifies a much deeper problem of insecurity and lack of confidence in our skin. We encounter insecurity and lack of confidence at many occasions in life, e.g., when a classmate scores higher than us on a test, our colleague gets a promotion and moves to a higher position, when we watch a good looking actor on TV, etc. We try to overcome these negative and sinful emotions by "joining" them, or "leaving" them. We either try to copy them or try and enter their social sphere to feel "accepted". Or, we either "leave" them and avoid entering their circle and maintain a healthy distance and keep our ego somewhat satisfied.
I know many people who I tend to avoid to maintain the sanity and peace of my mind. Sometimes I call it envy, but most of the time there are many under the surface bitter memories, or their prickly personalities, which are dictating my behavior towards them. In order to deal with those people around me, I have concluded to keep my interactions short and sweet. I call them 'high-five interactions' in which I have five minutes to sit down with them, catch up with them on a very high level, in high and good spirits. And as soon as the 5 minutes are up, I have to end my interaction and end it on good terms.
The more details we try to dig with a prickly person, our relationship will end up getting more convoluted and entangled. They key is simplicity, especially with the matters we find complicated to handle. Not everything in this world is meant to be resolved. Some complicated things are there so that we can differentiate the non-complicated things from them. The bad in this world is there, so that we can identify and appreciate the good. Same is the case with those prickly people, with very insecure ego and big mouths, they exist so that we can find the wise people and enjoy their company.
But it is also important to note that all of us have acted prickly towards someone else at some point. Some people have underlying reasons to act in such a way, but some people have a natural tendency to behave like that. We can very easily see which category we fall in. If we are aware that we have been thorny to someone, that means we did that on purpose to hurt that person to seek revenge, and that is not our natural personality. But, if we cannot identify if we have been thorny or if we have been bitter to others, then that is when our nature does not know that there is a fine line which exists to maintain harmony. And since thorny people cannot see the line, they tend to cross it back and forth frequently out of habit.
So let's analyze ourselves and see if we can admit to ourselves if we tried to be thorny to someone on purpose, just to seek revenge for a wrong they did to us, or to satisfy the envy of our malicious spirit. Once we can identify those occasions, we can work on bettering our spirit. Though it will only be easy and highly possible for people who lack the natural tendency of being thorny towards others.
Our sense of envy and jealousy also plays a very vital role in judging others. Many times we want to drag a person down from his/her level, to the lowest level we think is fit for that person, just so that we can satisfy our pride. We try to slander a person's reputation, so that we can uplift our malicious spirit to a level higher than the one we slandered.
This signifies a much deeper problem of insecurity and lack of confidence in our skin. We encounter insecurity and lack of confidence at many occasions in life, e.g., when a classmate scores higher than us on a test, our colleague gets a promotion and moves to a higher position, when we watch a good looking actor on TV, etc. We try to overcome these negative and sinful emotions by "joining" them, or "leaving" them. We either try to copy them or try and enter their social sphere to feel "accepted". Or, we either "leave" them and avoid entering their circle and maintain a healthy distance and keep our ego somewhat satisfied.
I know many people who I tend to avoid to maintain the sanity and peace of my mind. Sometimes I call it envy, but most of the time there are many under the surface bitter memories, or their prickly personalities, which are dictating my behavior towards them. In order to deal with those people around me, I have concluded to keep my interactions short and sweet. I call them 'high-five interactions' in which I have five minutes to sit down with them, catch up with them on a very high level, in high and good spirits. And as soon as the 5 minutes are up, I have to end my interaction and end it on good terms.
The more details we try to dig with a prickly person, our relationship will end up getting more convoluted and entangled. They key is simplicity, especially with the matters we find complicated to handle. Not everything in this world is meant to be resolved. Some complicated things are there so that we can differentiate the non-complicated things from them. The bad in this world is there, so that we can identify and appreciate the good. Same is the case with those prickly people, with very insecure ego and big mouths, they exist so that we can find the wise people and enjoy their company.
But it is also important to note that all of us have acted prickly towards someone else at some point. Some people have underlying reasons to act in such a way, but some people have a natural tendency to behave like that. We can very easily see which category we fall in. If we are aware that we have been thorny to someone, that means we did that on purpose to hurt that person to seek revenge, and that is not our natural personality. But, if we cannot identify if we have been thorny or if we have been bitter to others, then that is when our nature does not know that there is a fine line which exists to maintain harmony. And since thorny people cannot see the line, they tend to cross it back and forth frequently out of habit.
So let's analyze ourselves and see if we can admit to ourselves if we tried to be thorny to someone on purpose, just to seek revenge for a wrong they did to us, or to satisfy the envy of our malicious spirit. Once we can identify those occasions, we can work on bettering our spirit. Though it will only be easy and highly possible for people who lack the natural tendency of being thorny towards others.
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